Truth or Dare.



Ever played the game called "Truth or Dare"?


What...are you like, from the past? -_-

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I've played this game, so far, twice. And the first time was so much better than the second one. Hahahahahahahahah I don't really like this game, but I sort of like it. You know, the mixed feelings... Hmmm. But whatever. It encourages you to be absolutely honest with your friends. That is, if you trust them with your whole heart.

Truth or Dare? More like "let's skip the dares" or "tell me who you like".


The first time I played this game when I was in form 5, during the Perkhemahan Perdana, with my girl classmates. We made a circle *fefeeling ada campfire kat tengah tu walaupun takde pun uhuks* and we played the game lah. Of course with my luck and everything, I didn't get to admit anything or do any dare for the first few rounds. Hahahahahahahah but it was fun, at least I could be honest, because they were all girls. And they were my classmates.

I miss them a lot. HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH *not funny but I want to laugh anyway*

I chose "Truth". Tak silap aku, aku dapat soalan ni, "Siapa kawan lelaki yang awak paling rapat sekali?" and I answered, because they didn't know the guy. Aku jawab Aliuddin lah, my old best friend. We were best friends back then, tapi bila aku masuk SHAMS (or when we entered secondary school), we were just friends. Lulz. I'm not sad, okay. It has to be that way. We are still friends by the way. I'd bash him when I have the chance.

Sepanjang sekolah menengah, ada lah jumpa sekali-sekala. He came to my house to borrow my books and some other pelajaran things (-_-")

Last sem I went to his Abang and Kakak's weddings and he had this ugly haircut so when he came to have a conversation with me at the table (he was being a good tuan rumah), my greeting for him was, "Lawa rambut," sarcastically. You see, you don't say nice things to your best friends you know. Hahahahahahahahahahah

Okay macam lari topik je? Hahahahahahahah

One of my friends chose "Dare" and being the good girl I was, I dared her to do the Futterwacken dance. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH impossibru

Johnny Depp | via Tumblr

But she skipped that dare because aku pun tak tahu macamana hahahahahahahah so I dared her (I have this big brain of evil ideas, too, not just for Science stuffs lol) to mime the song "Gemuruh" by Faizal Tahir (apparently at the time there was a carnival near our campsite and they were playing Gemuruh) along with the gaya and all. It was fun and entertaining x))))

Okay, so I also got to pick a second time. I still chose "Truth" because I was to lazy to get up -_- So, of course lah, since I had escaped the "who do you like" question the first time, of course la I got it the second time.

Oh my God how embarrassing this is to say...


Pb is not plumbum or lead. It's Peanut Butter. There was this time when I really liked to hear that song by Auburn, "You can be the peanut butter to my jelly" I forgot the name of the song. Lolz. So Pb was/is the nickname for someone...........................whom I really liked. He's a nice guy. He was never the "bad guy" kind.

Only I couldn't stop making him be annoyed at me (but knowing him, he probably wasn't annoyed at me, just sad) aherrherrherrr *guilty but innocent* He doesn't know I had a crush on him and let's hope it stays that way.................

 OMG Alya, Piah, Ainul, Piqah and Kakti are so gonna bash me after they read this......................

By the way I'm not "jelly" to the peanut butter

Well, I HAD a crush on him, so after dah habis SPM, we lost contact *just kidding* HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA. Ada lah dia contact for some urusan sekolah and those.

Aku masa sekolah dulu tak mesej lelaki except for my family lah, and my future brother-in-law. Kehkehkeh. And if aku mesej budak lelaki pun, itu semua urusan sekolah.

So after dah habis semua urusan sekolah semua, I never see him anymore, or talk to him or text him. And I'm glad I don't have to face him anymore because I won't be able to control my laughter if I see him again. (I just have this weird sense of humor after I am done crushing on someone lulz)

And to this day, ramai lagi rasanya gegirls in my class 5 Muslim yang tak tahu who Pb is. Dahlah, move on jelah k. Hihihihihihi

The second time I played "Truth or Dare" was with my SH3 friendssssssssssssssssss.

Thanks to Syesye sebab ambik gambo omey ineyh (ke aku je yang comel hihi)

Ni lah geng yang ada time Truth or Dare. Dari kiri bawah, Insyi, Yanie, Nana, Ijan. Start dari kiri yang atas tu, yang beria buat peace dua belah tangan tu nama dia Ipyz. Pastu yang hoodie tu (OMG SHIKIN ARE YOU THE ARROW? Lol bye fifi) Shikin, next to her is Maryam, Akmal Zayn, Iqbal and Qiela. And they HAD to play with the balloons. I hate balloons... I really do. Now you know one of my fears. #FifisFears

We played this game for some time. Lama gila weh main game ni. I shouldn't have said anything since we swore that night that what happened that night, will never be spoken of anywhere, anytime to anyone.

Ijan was the first "lucky" guy that night. He chose "Truth". And then everyone was like, "Nak tanya apa..." and then Nana asked him. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAH Dahlah I will never move on from this scene hhahahahahahahahahahah Nana tanya, "Aku cantik tak?" Bongok Nana whaahawhwhawhawhlksjfdsjgksgsfg seriously lawak okeh masa tu

Then, when it was Akmal's turn, he had chosen "Truth", too. Being the very sweet girl I was, I asked the simplest question, "Apa pengalaman kau yang paling memalukan?" and then Ijan protested, "Woi mana aci! Soalan dia senang! Soalan aku tadi susah gila!!!!" WAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAA haddooooooooooooo dahlah I cannot

Ijan nanti ada cucu tanya camni, jawab macam pakcik ni eh

Okay moving on. There were a few moments of "Truth" yang really really really chilly and it was really uncomfortable. In the end everyone got the question, "Who do you like?" of some sort. But Dani showed up an hour late, and all of us made way for Nana to ask him the "ultimate" question HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA #NeverMovingOn

And then because everyone was playing safe (since the dares for Yanie and Qiela were both a bit 'daring') by choosing "Truth", in the end semua dipaksa buat dare. I got the dare to do a selfie and post it on my Instagram. For a fact, I don't do selfie (alone) and post them on my Instagram. Aku hanya selfie if I'm with my family or friends and muka tak dekat sangat or senang cerita, bukan muka aku sorang dekat skrin. K.

But that was the second choice they dared me to do. The first one was.....aku kena pecahkan belon. NO WAY. NO FRICKING WAY. IF SOMEONE CRIED THAT NIGHT, IT WAS GOING TO END REALLY BADLY FOR US LULZ (aku pun tak tahu kenapa aku takut sangat belon. aku takut bila belon tu pecah. I hate being "terkejut" by a really loud noise)


Actually the first time I heard of this game, I thought this game was a game related to paranormal. Lolllllllllllllll because of that word "dare". Then I finally got it, maybe from watching shows on TV. Seriously this game is dangerous, for the heart. I remembered that one scene from The Perks of Being A Wallflower, when Charlie was dared to kiss the most beautiful girl in that room.

Imagine if you're being asked that "who is your crush" question and your crush is in the circle?

Takkanlah nak confess pulak tetiba dalam circle tu -_- I can't imagine that happening, and I hope I would never have to face something like that, ever.

Well, I'm sorry to everyone who played this game with me before. I may have twisted the truth a bit... Hehehehehehehehe :3

There's a lot to gain and a lot to lose from this game. Mainlah bebetul. If you think you're not ready to tell the truth, then twist la the truth a bit, or just ask for another question. It's not that you don't trust these circle of people, it's just that you're NOT ready. Everyone has secrets of their own, maybe those secrets are eating them up inside but if you're not ready, then don't let them out.

Apa-apa pun just be brave. And trust your instincts. "Truth or Dare" game doesn't define you or who you are. It's just a silly game.

p/s: Ada jugak bila orang tanya "Truth or Dare?" lepas tu dia pergi jawab "or". Dia ingat lawak lah tu. Hmmm

Entri Tipikal - PASUM


Assalamualaikum semua orangs! Harini aku nak cerita pasal PASUM.

Apakah itu PASUM?

PASUM ni singkatan untuk Pusat Asasi Sains Universiti Malaya. Ada dua jenis Asasi; Sains Hayat dan Sains Fizikal.

Apa beza Sains Hayat dan Sains Fizikal?

Asasi kat PASUM ni berbeza sikit dengan Asasi UiTM atau mana-mana asasi kat Universiti lain. Contohnya diorang kat asasi lain ambik 4 subjek dan jawab hekzem 4 papers, kat PASUM ni 4 subjek jugak, tapi dia pecah-pecah. Nanti exam kena ambik 8 papers, tak termasuk English.

Sains Hayat (aku budak hayat!)

Untuk Semester 1, akan ada subjek-subjek tersebut;
  • Cell Biology
  • Reproduction and Ecology (something like that lah hahahaha)
  • Calculus
  • Algebra
  • Basic Chemistry 1
  • Organic Chemistry 1
  • Basic Physics 1
  • Basic Physics 2

Untuk Semester 2 pulak;
  • Genetics and DNA
  • Physiology of Organisms
  • Statistics and Probability
  • Algebra and Calculus
  • Basic Chemistry 2
  • Organic Chemistry 2
  • Basic Physics 3
  • Basic Physics 4
Basically kalau sesiapa yang ambik Sains Hayat ni, probability dia nak ambik engineering/kursus setaraf lepas PASUM masih lagi ada. Berbeza pulak dengan Sains Fizikal.

Sains Fizikal

Untuk Semester 1, subjek-subjek ini yang diorang belajar;
  • Vector
  • Computer Science
  • Calculus
  • Algebra
  • Basic Chemistry 1
  • Organic Chemistry 2
  • Basic Physics 1
  • Basic Physics 2

Untuk Semester 2 pulak;
  • Engineering Mathematics
  • Computer Science
  • Probability and Statistics
  • Algebra and Calculus
  • Basic Chemistry 2
  • Organic Chemistry 2
  • Basic Physics 3
  • Basic Physics 4
Bezanya Fizikal tak ada Biology, and Hayat tak ada Computer Science and Vector and Engineering Maths. Soooo, kemungkinan budak Fizikal nak ambik subjek yang macam Medic ke, Dentistry ke, courses based on Biology ke, tak boleh lah. Yang betul-betul tak minat Biologi tu bolehlah apply Sains Fizikal.

Practicals (Physics, Chemistry and Biology)
Kiteorang panggil lab. Untuk budak fizikal diorang takde lab Bio tapi ada lab computer science. But anyway, semua practical ni okay je except for Chemistry. Awal-awal aku cakap eh, if dapat demonstrator yang OK, then you'll be more OK than others, but still torturous. Masa sem 1 dulu aku dapat demo yang baikkkk sangat and memang baik ah, so bearable lah. But still every week I was never eager for Chemistry lab.

But masa sem 2...kbye horror doh. Every single week aku rasa macam nak bypass je hari SELASA and I don't want to face any Chemistry lab. It wasn't the experiments, but the PEOPLE. Gila gila gila malam sebelum ada lab Chem aku memang akan terfikir macamana cara untuk tak hadir lab Chem (it was only a matter of THOUGHTS and I was never absent for Chem lab lulzzzzzzz). Okay hope korang akan jadi lebih tabah dari aku. Kbye

Grouping Sains Hayat dan Fizikal

Untuk Sains Hayat kat PASUM ni ada dua group. Dipanggil Hayat 1 dan Hayat 2. Tiada diskriminasi dalam mengklasifikasikan kedua-dua group ni, just randomly sorted je. For every Hayat group ada kelas-kelas tutorial;

Hayat 1

  • NH1, NH2, NH3
  • PH1, PH2, PH3
  • QH1, QH2, QH3
  • RH1, RH2, RH3
  • SH1, SH2, SH3 (bubar)

Hayat 2

  • VH1, VH2. VH3
  • WH1. WH2, WH3
  • XH1, XH2. XH3
  • YH1. YH2. YH3
  • ZH1. ZH2. ZH3 (bubar)

Sains Fizikal pun ada Fizikal 1 dan Fizikal 2.

Fizikal 1

  • AF1. AF2, AF3
  • BF1. BF2, BF3
  • CF1. CF2. CF3

Fizikal 2

  • GF1. GF2. GF3
  • JF1. JF2. JF3
  • KF1. KF2
  • LF1. LF2
Kebiasaannya budak Fizikal lagi sedikit berbanding budak Hayat. Ni based on tahun aku lah. Kelas-kelas tu semua pun. Maybe akan datang huruf tu akan ditukar, dulu nama kelas N1, N2, N3 macam tu je. Takde lah H ke F kat tengah-tengah tu nak bezakan kelas hayat dan fizikal. Alah takyah risau sangatlah pasal kelas ni, saja je nak cerita hahahahahahahahkbye

Budak Hayat dan Budak Fizikal

Usually bebudak hayat ni yang baik-baik, yang style nerd nerd, follow the rules macam tu, if compared to budak fizikal. Bakal-bakal doktor semua stick to the rules and skema. Asyik pegang buku/nota sana sini, haaaa, budak hayat lettew. Takdenye budak fizikal kelek buku/nota sana sini sebab diorang semua hidup penuh casual. Serious talk.

Budak fizikal tak nampak macam nerd -___- diorang memang full of freedom lah (depends on how you define freedom in PASUM hahahaha). Entahlah kenapa diorang tenang bak tasik varsiti je, tapi sumpah jeles tengok diorang kekadang --'

Life in PASUM

If you want a healthy, stress-free lifestyle, then PASUM is not for you.

Sorry la baqhang kalau rasa nak rilek rilek nak watlek watpeace, jangan apply PASUM k. Rutin harian PASUM ni BELAJAR BELAJAR BELAJAR je. Starting 2014 (my year), all Asasi students are to be placed at Kolej Kediaman Ungku Aziz (KUAZ) or KK11, which is a 10-to-15-minute walk to PASUM and if you're lucky you can have a bus ride xD So your class will start at either 8am or 9am in the morning and akan habis at 5pm EVERY SINGLE DAY *evil smile* and you have only one hour for lunch, which is at 1pm, and you have to solat zohor too :))))))

Then after a day of lectures or tutorial classes or labs, you'd go back to your room feeling worn out macam hape je. That is, kalau takde lecture ganti at 5 to 6pm :)))))) If you do, then, byebye. Bila balik room tu memang rasa nak tidur tidur tidur katil memang bagi lambaian sejati penuh kasih. But first you have to shower, then eat your dinner, thennnnnnnnnnnnnnn proceed to do your tutorials and studying and revisions :)))))))) Every single week ada tutorials from each of the subject, aher her her. Serabut otak is a usual thing for us.

So, yeahh only a person with a strong-willed heart can do it in PASUM. If you think you're tough enough, then WELCOME TO PASUM! If you're willing to be a robot for 10 months, then you're welcomed here. Seriously PASUM students are the golden children of UM (read: anak emas hahahahahahahahahha)

But the best things about PASUM are;

  • Your teachers are your lecturers
  • Your exam papers are done by your lecturers
  • Your exam papers are also marked by your lecturers

I admit it's not easy to score in the examination, you have to work 200 times harder than SPM. But if there's a will, there's a way. Kalau betul-betul focus and you can give your all out, then why not? You can survive in PASUM. If you think you can't...just think you can lah. I thought I wasn't going to survive PASUM before, but now, look at me now! PASUM dah habis! And I made it out in one piece!

Kolej Kediaman Kesebelas (KUAZ)

Kolej ni nama dia Kolej Kediaman Ungku Aziz, so in short we call it KUAZ. So here's a bit about KUAZ;

  • One room four persons
  • Four rooms per cube
  • Washing machine RM2 sekali guna (HAHAHAHHAHAH)
  • Ada ironing board dekat washing machine
  • Bathroom stalls and toilet stalls
  • Ada cafe yang banyak gerai, so you can choose any
  • Dewan Pendeta (mostly semua aktiviti kolej are held there)
  • Ada kedai dobi
  • Ada banyak gazebo tempat lepaks/study

For those who have experienced hostel life, let me tell you, staying at residential college isn't the same. Kat hostel, food is provided for you but here you have to manage your expenses on your own.

UM is in the middle of KL. Mid Valley is just a stone's throw. Tu memang tempat budak PASUM ah. Stesen LRT so near. So these can be a distraction, that means you have to restrain yourselves at times. Aku selalu gi Mid makan sushi and tengok wayang je. But tu jarang lah. Hahahahahahah

Make time to know UM more. You'll have plenty of time for yourselves but masa tu jelah masa untuk study balik and revise. My suggestion is that you focus first on your studies, after completing PASUM you enjoy lah puas-puas.

Any place is susah. It depends on you lah. Everyone can succeed. Attitude tu penting.


Perempuan. Walau bagaimana sibuk dan aktif dalam society, kental bawa diri tak ada pakwe, bersemangat dalam dakwah atau bijak melangit dalam pelajaran, tetap takkan lari daripada bicara soal hati.

Andai hati itu asalnya lembut maka selamanya jua lembut.

Suka orang itu. Suka orang ini.
Nak jaga hati.
Tak nak lagha.
Tak nak fikir yang sia-sia.
Kadang-kadang rasa rindu sangat sampai nak kahwin sahaja lagi mudah.
Tengok orang couple, rasa nak couple juga, bila fikir balik, tak nak couple sebab tak nak buat perkara menghala dosa, tetapi jiwa terseksa.
Tengok orang kahwin, nak kahwin juga, tak tahu kenapa rasa nak kahwin datang tetapi yang tahu hanya mahu kahwin bila seronok tengok orang kahwin.

Pelbagai rasa didengari.
Bercampur-baur dalam hati.

Itu lumrah, sayang.
Apatah lagi dalam umur yang makin meningkat dewasa.
Soal hati dan fitrah rasa untuk disayangi dan menyayangi itu biasa.

Cuma terkadang diri perlu tahu, fokus kehidupannya di mana.
Suka itu tidak salah namun usah sehingga tidak lalu makan nasi goreng ayam paprik tiga hari hanya kerana sakit menahan rindu.

Wake up. Hidup dalam dunia sebenar.
Perjalanan dalam hidup ini jauh.
Bukan sekadar soal saya-suka-awak dan awak-suka-saya, tiada-apa-lagi-yang-menjadi-penghalang-antara-kita dan jom-kahwin semata.

Itu salah satu cabang daripada banyak cabang dalam kehidupan.
Salah satu cabang yang penting.
Dan ada banyak lagi cabang penting lain juga yang perlu diberi fokus.

Rasa yang datang tiada siapa yang sengaja mengundang.
Usah dipadam perasaan fitrah itu tetapi bijaklah dalam mengawal rasa suka.

Itu yang dikata.
Bila suka jangan terlalu suka.
Bila benci usah terlalu benci.
Selalulah untuk berada di tengah-tengah.
Kerana selama tiada ikatan halal yang termeterai, dia bukan sesiapa lagi untuk dicintai sepenuh rasa.
Genggam kemas hati itu baik-baik.
Usah mudah lemah.
Bina semangat yang kental.

Cari di mana jiwa yang benar menangis rindukan Rabbi seperti Rabi'ah el-Adawiyah.
Cari di mana jiwa yang selalu bermunajat dan hanya berharap pada Tuhannya seperti puteri kesayangan Rasulullah SAW, Fatimah Azzahra.
Cari di mana jiwa yang tertanam akidah yang unggul di dalam hatinya seperti Masyitah yang tegar terjun ke dalam minyak yang panas semata-mata untuk mempertahankan keimanan.
Cari di mana jiwa seorang Sumayyah yang rela diseksa dengan pelbagai dugaan yang menyakitkan hanya untuk mempertahankan kalimah Ahad.
Cari di mana jiwa seorang Zinnirah yang rela dijemur di tengah padang pasir bersama cahaya yang terik dan dibutakan mata hanya semata teguh mempertahankan keyakinan akidah.

Belajarlah menjadi seorang wanita.
Belajar untuk menjadi seorang wanita berjiwa hebat seperti srikandi-srikandi Islam.

Jangan biar diri gatal hanya mahu kahwin sahaja sedang persiapan diri layu.

Waktu mahu kahwin sememangnya mahu kahwin kerana yang ada di hadapan segalanya terlihat indah.
Tempoh selepas kahwin bukan sehari dua, tetapi biar mahu sampai ke syurga.
Mahu kahwin bukan hidup berdua sahaja, nantinya keluarga sudah makin bertambah besar.

Kahwin bukan soal cinta dan suka sahaja.
Perkahwinan penuh dengan tanggungjawab yang menanti.

Kalau kita yang seorang perempuan sekarang malas mahu menimba ilmu, maka dengan apa lagi mahu dididik anak-anak yang sedang membesar.
Kalau kita yang seorang perempuan lemah dalam mujahadah diri untuk buat amal maka contoh kebaikan apa lagi yang mahu ditunjukkan kepada anak-anak.
Kalau kita yang seorang perempuan hanya tahu untuk duduk bersenang-lenang dan lemah jiwanya maka siapa lagi yang mahu berada di belakang menguatkan perjalanan dakwah seorang suami.
Kalau kita yang seorang perempuan lemah dalam menjaga kehormatan diri maka kecintaan dan kesetiaan apa yang akan tinggal buat seorang suami yang teguh menanti kelak.
Kalau kita yang seorang perempuan lemah dalam mengendalikan emosi maka siapa lagi yang akan membantu suami untuk mengemudi bahtera keluarga yang bahagia.
Kalau kita seorang perempuan yang tiada matlamat tinggi dalam hidup maka siapa lagi yang akan bersedia membina jiwa besar dalam diri mujahid-mujahid kecil.

Ilmu sekarang bukan untuk skor Dean's List dan belajar jurusan di universiti sahaja.
Ilmu sekarang perlu dicari dan sekurangnya diri punya asas dalam pelbagai cabang ilmu.

Saat tiada terikat dengan tanggungjawab rumah tangga inilah waktunya untuk menimba ilmu dengan sebenarnya.
Setidaknya mahu untuk belajar hukum-hukum fiqh.
Setidaknya belajar bagaimana mahu untuk melayan dan mengerti rentak isi hati dan jiwa si kecil.
Setidaknya belajar bagaimana untuk menyesuaikan diri dalam masyarakat yang pelbagai.
Setidaknya mahu belajar bagaimana untuk memperbaiki solat dan memperbaiki kefahaman dalam Al-Quran.
Setidaknya belajar tentang ilmu rumah tangga.

Belajarlah memasak. Biarlah potong bawang 3 hiris juga sudah menangis sebaldi. Asal sahaja mahu untuk belajar.
Jadi anak dara harus belajar untuk bangun dan perkemaskan diri awal pagi.
Bukan pula untuk tidur melangit hingga ke tengah hari.
Belajar bagaimana mahu jadi seorang wanita yang produktif.

Ya. Kita bukan sempurna untuk tahu dan buat banyak perkara.
Dan kerana tidak tahu banyak perkara itulah kita perlu belajar banyak perkara.
Hidup ini satu medan yang penuh hikmah untuk kita ambil dan pelajari sesuatu tiap saat.
Tak ada orang yang secara semulajadi tahu banyak perkara.
Melainkan dia cuba untuk ambil tahu dan mahu belajar.

Ini bukan untuk mendesak diri menjadi seorang perempuan yang sempurna tanpa cela tiap segi dan hebat sehingga bisa untuk terbang merentasi langit ke-7 mengalahkan Wonder Woman.
Ini mahu memberi sejentik kesedaran bagaimana seorang perempuan harus berperanan terutama dalam dunia moden zaman kini.

Kerana kematangan bukan diukur sejauh mana kemahiran dalam berselfie baik tudung labuh, berniqab atau melilit-lilit.
Kerana kematangan itu ada pada ilmu dalam diri dan nilai dalam memandang kehidupan.
Dan kerana kematangan itu ada pada hati yang selalu membawa jiwa seorang hamba dalam dirinya.

Usah terlalu risau akan soal jodoh.
Usahalah setakat mana yang mampu.
Asal sahaja diri tahu untuk menjaga kehormatan diri maka dia yang begitu jualah yang bakal dihadirkan Allah.
Asal sahaja hati terus teguh pada jalan dakwah dan kebenaran maka dia yang begitu jualah yang akan datang melengkapkan kehidupan.

Hidup ini cukup mudah.
Buat apa yang Allah suka dan reda.
Dan suka serta reda dengan tiap apa yang diberi Allah.
Kerana tiada apa yang tidak baik datang daripada Allah melainkan segalanya baik-baik belaka.

Berbahagialah duhai muslimah.


Penat juga membebel.
Dah habis masa pegang watak nenek tua pakai tongkat yang banyak berleter.

-Moga bermanfaat-

Dipetik dari Facebook Nur Raudah

Writing - Fight for our BM!



So, today I was bickering on Twitter about Malay books/novels. I have nothing against my own language but the people who write those novels, it's them that I have something to say about. I'm not condemning (or maybe I am? But this is for the better...kot) or anything, tapi I'm just sharing my thoughts/opinions here. Mungkin this contradicts the fact that I'm gonna talk on Malay writings but I'm here writing in English aherrherrrherrr

A Vintage Type Writer.

Okaylah I cakap Melayu. Ihiks!

So far from my observation/judgement/experience, novel-novel Melayu sekarang semua hampeh. Of course la, you guys already know that. Or not? Only people who truly appreciate literature and language would understand this sort of problem. Why? Because from what I've seen, Malay authors nowadays don't care about literature. Tak kisah langsung pasal 'bahasa'. They only care about their stories, their urge, the need to publish their love-struck tales. Some maybe do it for the money they'd get after their novels have been published and even better, being made into TV series or movies. *claps hands*

But if you really read those books, do you find any art in their words? Or you don't care? Well, writing isn't just about "having deep sentences", "how the couple finally achieves tranquility in the end", no it's not. In your writing, you have to have a good grammar, dexterous proficiency of language and an absorbing plot. You also have to consider how the story will affect your readers, and put in mind that you shouldn't use profanity as a way of expressing feelings (such as when any of the characters gets angry or something).

Oi tadi kata nak tulis Melayu?! Erm...

Books are supposed to open up the readers' minds. If you only write about kahwin paksa, the third wheel's planning some evil revenge to destroy people's marriage... I say no. That's so unhealthy to people's minds. Huhuhu. I never said that I never read these books. But I guess I've stopped reading these kinds of novels. I hope people would stop writing these bunch of rubbish, because we need something healthy to look forward to. Malays are already lacking of readers, and then all these readers are given these forced marriage books. *sighs*

We need new ideas, some refreshment to the minds. I found Fixi books awesome, their gratifying plots and these books sometimes could change us. There are certain things to think about after you read the book. For instance, novel Kelabu. So much wow. That book certainly dropped my jaw to the floor, seriously no kidding. I recommend you readers to read it. It's worth the read.

These fixi books are an interesting example of how the publishers promoting writing and reading amongst youngsters these days. That is good, and they publish good books, too. I mean, they choose the rarest plots and in the end you find yourself entertained by the read. But one thing that I don't agree with Fixi books are that they allow authors to use profanity and bad language. Bahasa 'slanga', they call it, and they allow it. I know it's a way to attract teens, but it's no way to preserve our language like that.

(2) Tumblr
Please ignore the fact that this person simply made a mess on this beautiful book T.T

I really like reading, love it, even. But there are some strict rules that I apply as to what I read. And that's definitely why I don't read Malay books anymore. I was only hangat hangat tahi ayam when I found out about Fixi books, and the first book I read was Kelabu, and it turned out great. For a moment there I thought all Fixi books were like Kelabu, the ideas so freshly baked, but then I was wrong. Huks huks. There are some other books who try their best to use perfect Malay but they insist on using bad words.

The words 'babi', 'shiz', 'fuuuu' and a bunch of other words that I had never known are widely used in their writing. I cannot accept this. I oppose this strongly. No. The teenagers, the adults, NOW, are using those words without feeling guilty already, and now you are encouraging them to SWEAR in your books? No, I can't accept it. No way I'm going to. Books are supposed to be pure, because they're going to teach people, don't use them to destroy what is still left of our heritage. *I feel like crying* I, myself, is not very good in Bahasa Melayu (but I still got A+ in SPM muehehe), but I really try to not use it wrongly and randomly. That's maybe one of the reasons I blog, so that I can still maintain my BM but I use slanga, too, but this isn't a novel, it's a blog. K.

And because I'm not good in BM, I don't really fancy writing in BM. I'm afraid that I'd be one of the people that'd lead Bahasa Melayu go down the drain. Sobs. I admit, Bahasa Melayu is a lot harder than any other language I've ever learned but I love Bahasa Melayu. Macam dalam cerita lama lama, novel lama-lama. All those novels that we had studied during our education in high school, those, those are the ones that are helping preserving Bahasa Melayu. Not the ones we read now. Their sentence structures and the bombastic words are at the right places. Although we claim the novels to be "boring", those are the ones that'd save our mother-tongue language.

I fancy Ramli Awang Murshid's books. I got to read one of his books once, and I really like it. And that was seven years ago, I guess. But at the time I was obsessed with AinMaisarah's books, erm, yep, I read those... OK, moving on, I haven't had the change to find out more about his books, and partly because, this is hard for me to say... because I think I've lost faith in Malay books *cries*. So many bad books rather than the good ones. I hope in the future I'd find new young authors that are willing to think outside of the box and publish their grand mind-opening ideas to the world. I certainly hope so.

Well, I am hoping that I will be one of the new young authors......

I don't dare to write this post in Melayu fully because... I don't know. Things come to my mind in English and when I type, and write, my fingers automatically type English words and then it leads to sentences. I know, I am no one to talk about the art of our language, let alone criticising people about their books, but I'm here to start a change. Maybe a little spark would do. But in the end, what matters most is what we are doing with ourselves. I may write about how corrupt the Malay writing has been, but it would be for nothing if I don't do something with the way I write and talk and socialise with people.

Every change starts within. So let's start towards good Bahasa Melayu from now!

Semangat tak buat banner? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH :-*

Farewell PASUM (Part 2)


Okay the post before is about SH3. So, today...


Aku ditempatkan kat kolej kediaman kesebelas a.k.a Kolej Ungku Aziz *nyanyi sket*. Ada dalam 32 orang je kot semua, so sebab tu kiteorang gelarkan diri kiteorang The Original Kuazians. Semua budak Hayat. Untuk minggu MHS tu, aku volunteer jadi penolong sebab takde orang nak volunteer so ipy pun pasrah jelah en. Agak torturous jugaklah minggu tu.....tapi fun. Ada satu insiden nih, dari KUAZ nak ke DTC (Dewan Tunku Canselor), kena jalan kaki dalam 15 minit gitu ah. Then satu pagi ni, L/O yang jaga kami, L/O Izzati and DS, diorang suruh kami jalan cepat sebab lambat seminit dua. THEN NADIA LEAD. LEPAS TU DIA JALAN LAJU GILA NAK ARWAH SAMPAI L/O SENDIRI PUN TERMENGAH-MENGAH LAST SEKALI PADAN MUKA SEMUA ORANG -_-

Tu lah pengalaman yang takleh lupa masa MHS.

Orang first aku kenal ialah Amal, of course. Amal is the only child in her family, so she's a bit independent and likes to do things on her own. She's a funny girl, too. The first night we slept on the floor side by side because it was so hot. YELAH I KAN BIASA TIDUR DALAM EKON HUUU. The second and third and a few nights after, Wahidah joined us on the floor. Hahahahahahahah dengan teddy bear aku, tapak kaki Bigfoot Amal semua sumbat sekali

Then Wahidah.

My twin. My soulmate. My partner in crime. Perangai lebih kurang. Kiteorang suka pergi date berdua. Watch movies together. EAT A LOT TOGETHER. DIETING FOR ONLY A WEEK TOGETHER THEN GIVING UP AHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA I miss her already. Everywhere I went, she'd be there, and vice versa. Nasib baik tak sekelas. If not I'd be stuck with her all the time. Sot sot gila gila dengan dia. Pouring my hearts out to her. Cerita pasal kerasy, emo emo stuff, tickling her, recording videos, taking pictures, ya Allah sumpah banyak things I did with her T_T

Jessie didn't stay long, tho. She was my roommate for a few months, then she left for Kolej MARA Kulim. She's a quiet girl and likes to keep to herself but I kacau her all the time until she finally got tired of me and let me tease her continuously (not after being babbled by Wahidah and Amal to stop kacau Jess kihkihkih). Jess liked to listen to Counting Stars and she sang that song in the room every day, and to this day, Wahidah, Amal and I, whenever we hear the song, it'd remind us of Jess.

These three were my roommates masa sem 1. Sem 2 tetiba kiteorang kena pindah naik tingkat atas sekali (thanks KUAZ, now I dah kuros k just kidding hux) and we had a new roommate! Well her name is actually Syahidatul Fatimah Annur (semput jap, yelah gemok memang camni xD), but then on our first day of being roommates I 'excitedly' asked her, "CAN I CALL YOU SYIDA?!" and she was like, "Erm boleh je...memang semua orang panggil Syida pun." So that's thaaaat. In the end she got her nickname from me which is Syisyi. (After that everyone else in the cube called her Syisyi too hahahahhahahahahah)

At one point (dah nak habis PASUM la ni), Wahidah tanya, "Fiiii, sebelum awak panggil Syisyi dengan panggilan 'Syisyi', awak tahu tak apa maksud Syisyi?"

Dengan innocentnya aku jawablah, "Tak," sebab memang aku tak tahu.

Pastu Wahidah ngan Syisyi gelak-gelak (Amal takde, balik rumah hmmm). Wahidah pun jawablah, "Syisyi tu maksud dia kencing......" AND I WAS LIKE, "SYISYI! AWAK TAHU TAK?!" pastu Syisyi pun gelak je jawab, "Tahu...." WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT and you let me call you that what is this Syisyi WHAT but that meaning is in bahasa apa entah. I forgot already. But I proceed on calling her Syisyi anyway. Sometimes I also call Wahidah "Wiwi" and come to think of it, wee wee means kencing also. What the heck man. Enough because it's gross. Ewww. Syisyi is okay. Wiwi sounds cute, but I call Wahidah "Wa", "Joe", "Boboi" etc.

Syisyi, Wahidah and I bonded well. AMAL WAS ALWAYS ABSENT BECAUSE SHE WAS EITHER AT THE STUDY ROOM OR AT HOME. K. We three loved to lepak on the floor of the room doing homework and tutorials and stuff, watching movies and all, sometimes when we were bored, we'd play Raya songs from Youtube and do a sing-along. Every time Wahidah saw me opening Youtube, she'd be, "Fifiiii! Pasanglah lagu raya!" During puasa last year, it was understandable lah, but every time after that when she asked that I went with the flow je walaupun bulan Jamadil Awwal sekalipun. We are both crazy so yeah *emoji gelak nangis*

During the week before Malam Emas, I was sort of busy and I didn't know where everyone went but Amal was there for me. One of the reasons because she was in the same group as me, so whenever we saw each other, she'd see my lack-of-sleep face and at one point I had to endure some bickering from the students because of the transportation (I'm fine now thanks), and Amal was there to comfort me. Amal may seem uncaring but she's there for you.

Because of them, PASUM was bearable

Dear roommates,

Thanks sebab selalu ada ngan saya. Sobs. Surely I'm gonna miss you girls so much. I wish we'd still be roommates bila masuk degree nanti. But tulah. Degree pun tak tahu lagi masuk mana kan. Sorry segala moody saya awak semua terpaksa layan. Sepanjang sebilik, macam-macam jugaklah yang terjadi. But the best part is we get to know each other. Seriously akan rindu rindu rindu. Mana lagi nak dapat roommates macam awak semua T_T

All the best in the present and future! Although miles apart, kahwin jangan lupa jemput k! (OMG this is so cliche) If you ever need a bridesmaid.....I can find some for you HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH Don't forget me. I may change in the future, but don't forget our memories. Our laughs together, our cries... Mun ada rezki, boleh jumpak agik lak. Heks.

Wa, thanks for teaching me Sarawak and spending most of your time with me, although you have other friends, you still chose me.

Amal, thanks sebab awak kiteorang semua rasa nak belajar.........tapi takdelah serajin awak -_- But still, Amal, sayang awak sesangat, nanti nak gi rumah awak k.

Syisyi, thanks sebab tolong gelak dengan lawak saya. Jarang orang gelak dengar lawak saya sebab saya suka buat lawak hambar T____________T Thanks jugak atas nasihat-nasihat bernas tentang semuanya.

Dan, terima kasih sudi meminjamkan telinga mendengar rentetan hidup saya dengan crush saya yang tak kesampaian macam hape je hahahahahahhahahahah kelakarnya bila ingat balik. Sorry la selama ni tipu kata nak move on tapi tak move on jugak -_- OK OK kali ni betul, saya dah start betul betul betul move on ni.

Love you,




I guess when the time comes

You really can't afford to be strong anymore.

It's just that when you pretend to be strong,

People look up to you to be tough

People keep on hurting you

They break you

They destroy you

They make you bleed

Your already bleeding heart, they still try their best to add the grief

When in reality

If physically

Your heart were to be taken out

There would be stitches, handiplus, cellotape, band-aid

But then,

Because your tears never show themselves

Kept sealed hidden underneath the wounded heart

You're strong, they thought

When in fact you're broken inside

You are beyond damaged

Your strength is like a string being pulled by a mega force

Waiting to be snapped in half

But in the end, you remain strong

Because you are a string made up of the steel of experience

Made up of an iron of patience, a copper of sufferance

You then keep on standing, standing up with the face of a lion.

They thought you were invincible

No, no, they thought wrong

Humans are humans

And you are human

Incapable of escaping the cruelty of others.

And then we are all waiting

Waiting for the time

When the string finally snaps

When the light wavers and dies

And until then,

Your strength collapses.

This feeling


What is this feeling

This constant feeling

I can't erase

I have to get rid of this

This isn't healthy

Not one bit good for me


Stop this

I don't want this feeling

I don't hate it

But how I wish it wouldn't be here all the time


Never wanting to go away


I beg you

You have to go

You're not healthy


This feeling of wanting to eat 24-hour non-stop


Nampak makanan je rasa nak makan

Tak nampak pun rasa nak makan jugak


Dahlah nak gi bertapa

*bawak bekalan makanan untuk lima keturunan*




I believe every one of us is a superhero. Deep inside, maybe it hasn't surfaced yet, but it's there. A superhero doesn't have to wear caps, or masks or uniforms. Your mom and dad are superheroes. My dad is my superhero. All my life he has never let me down T_T My brothers are my superheroes. They are there in my time of need (OK la not all the time but still), they don't know how to handle me but at least they're here and they'd never hurt me intentionally. Let's not mention our Moms. They exceed the superhero title :')


Teachers are superheroes, too. Without them, what would become of us right now? No doctors to treat the sickly, no engineers to build magestic buildings, no architects to design complicated monuments, no bosses to boss around. For me, a teacher is not just a teacher. She doesn't just TEACH her students, she treats the wounded (heart), she tries to understand, she wants to help, she loves her students, she sacrifices time for her students. I remember my teachers during high school, I miss them so much right now (OKlah next week I'll visit SHAMS)

Doctors are superheroes.

Engineers are superheroes.

Interior designers are superheroes.

Cleaners are superheroes.

Lecturers are superheroes.

Asatizah (plural for ustaz/ustazah) are superheroes.

Well, everyone is, let's sum it up.

Even if we don't feel like one...well, you have the power to be one. As long as you're kind, and you can make people around you happy, YOU ARE A GREAT SUPERHERO! Feelings are complicated. Happy, sad, elated, heart-broken, they are hard to deal with. But! If you can make a sad person smile, then...doesn't that count as powerful? And  no ordinary human being is called powerful, unless they're superheroes, am I right?


This story is so sad T.T

Well, moving on... Here's the lyrics to the song "Superheroes" by The Script.

All her life she has seen
All the meaner side of me
They took away the prophet's dream for a profit on the street

Now she's stronger than you know
A heart of steel starts to grow

All his life he's been told
He'll be nothing when he's old
All the kicks and all the blows
He won't ever let it show

'Cause he's stronger than you know
A heart of steel starts to grow

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been struggling to make things right
That's how a superhero learns to fly
(Every day, every hour
Turn the pain into power)

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been working every day and night
That's how a superhero learns to fly
(Every day, every hour
Turn the pain into power)

All the hurt, all the lies
All the tears that they cry
When the moment is just right
You see fire in their eyes

'Cause he's stronger than you know
A heart of steel starts to grow

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been struggling to make things right
That's how a superhero learns to fly
Every day, every hour
Turn the pain into power

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been working every day and night
That's how a superhero learns to fly

She's got lions in her heart
A fire in her soul
He's a got a beast in his belly
That's so hard to control
'Cause they've taken too much hits
Taking blow by blow
Now light a match, stand back, watch them explode

She's got lions in her heart
A fire in her soul
He's a got a beast in his belly
That's so hard to control
'Cause they've taken too much hits
Taking blow by blow
Now light a match, stand back, watch them explode, explode, explode, explode

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been struggling to make things right
That's a how a superhero learns to fly

(Every day, every hour
Turn the pain into power)

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been working every day and night
That's a how a superhero learns to fly

When you've been fighting for it all your life
You've been struggling to make things right
That's how a superhero learns to fly

You don't have to be a mutant to save the world.

You don't have to have a wand to get rid of the dark.

You don't have to have flying shoes to keep the world intact.

You don't have to be Tris to save her community.

You don't have to be Katniss.

You don't have to be all those fictional characters saving the world.

You just have to be yourself. Find it, deep down inside you, that superhero lying underneath, waiting to be freed, and to save the world.

Glad to keep you reading, superhero. :)



Assalamualaikum. Hai. Current status aku tengah mereput bagai mende je ni. PASUM dah habis weehoooooooot! Setelah 10 bulan bertungkus-lumus dengan segala susah-payah dan memori cinta luka di kala ku kesepian. OK. Sumpah weh sekejap je, rasa macam tak sempat pun ambik gambar dengan seseorang! *memang tak sempat pun hmmm dahlah fi gi sambung mereput*

Embedded image permalink
close enough

Entahlah bila lagi boleh jumpa bebudak ini semua. Masing-masing dari tempat lain kot. Kalau dulu sekolah menengah, at least kau duduk satu negeri je (kepada yang tak duduk asrama penuh lah). Serius lain gila sangat rasa. Baru 10 bulan kenal, dah kamceng erat dah. Kalau tambah lagi dua puluh empat tahun, dengan anak-anak sekali tak nak berpisah. Tapi nak buat camana lagi, bila kita dah jumpa, mesti last last cakap "bye" jugak kan. (Dah, korang takyah nak forward mesej yang "bye" tu maksud dia ada kena-mengena dengan iluminati ke apa sebab mesej tu dari darjah lima sampai sekarang masih ada lagi)

PASUM ni situasi dia lain ah. Betul aku cakap. Bayangkan seorang Fifiey disekolahkan dalam persekitaran sekolah agama, tetiba masuk PASUM, tak masuk UIA ke USIM ke. PASUM ni tak ada lah teruk sangat sampai pagi-pagi pergi clubbing, tapi berkepit dengan boyfriend girlfriend itu macam dah pemandangan biasa dah kat sini. Seriously tak bosan ke berkepit je 24 jam hmm... Takpelah biarkan mereka. Kalau dulu dekat sekolah, memang takdelah asyik nak berkepit mepit. Tapi ada yang jenis duduk in a group campur lelaki dan perempuan, and dalam group tu ada ah yang berpasangan. Kui.

Aku takdelah culture shock sangat. Aku dah expect benda ni. Sapa suruh masuk PASUM? Eheh. Tapi tak semuanya berkisarkan gaya hidup sosial pelajar-pelajar PASUM. Ada jugak side yang Islamik. For those who seek for it, they are quite okay. Budak-budak usrah semua tu, sekali budak Asasi Pengajian Islam dan Sains (APIDS). Serious ikhwan akhawat (lamanya tak guna terms ini huks) APIDS sangat membantu.

Tempat berubah. Aku masih sama. Masih awkward tahap mende je. Masih sukar mengukir bait kata untuk berbual mesra dengan orang. Lol. Especially bila orang express their feelings dekat aku macam, "Weh aku gembira sangat jumpa dia tadi!", "Masa jalan-jalan hari tu, aku jumpa *inserts crush's name*!" dan seumpamanya, respon aku memang fail gila ah. Dengan ekspresi wajah yang sedikit blur plus cuba beriak gembira/bangga, seterusnya menghasilkan riak yang awkward, dengan sedikit, "Ohhh.." And then diorang akan tanya, "Tu je ke respon kau?"


Tapi ada lah rasa dewasa sikit. Dah boleh jauh dari Ummi and Walid. Hmm tu pun demam kalau lama tak jumpa ahaks. Walid's girl ni susah sikit jauh jauh ngan Walid. Parents aku cepat risau yelah anak bongsu kan, bukan parents je risau, abang-abang and kakak-kakak beserta abang and kakak-kakak ipar kalau boleh semua nak risau. Helo I dah besar okay? HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA BYE FIFIEY jangan riya' wa takkabur sangat k takde duit gi mintak ngan Walid jugak kan *emoji gelak nangis x100*

Time aku menaip ni, Wahidah dah balik semalam. Syisyi baru je gerak tadi. Wei sumpah aku nak nanges. Tadi Amal keluar, so sebelum keluar tu dia ingat aku balik petang ni, tak sempat jumpa, kiteorang hugging (as girls do) and she cried like a child. Aku tengok dia rasa nak nanges, dah lah memang nak nanges dah. Rupanya ada jugak orang yang sayang aku, tak nak aku pergi. OK macam hiperbola sikit huahuahua but still. It hurts a lot deep inside ni. I don't wanna leave any of this behind but life's gotta be what life's gotta be :')

Nah bagi lirik sikit; lagu Brothers.

Di sini kita pernah bertemu
Mencari warna seindah pelangi
Ketika kau menghulurkan tanganmu
Membawaku ke daerah yang baru

Kini dengarkanlah
Dendangan lagu tanda ikatanku
Kepadamu teman
Agar ikatan ukhuwah kan
Bersimpul padu

Kenangan bersamamu
Takkan ku lupa
Walau badai datang melanda
Walau bercerai jasad dan nyawa

Mengapa kita ditemukan
Dan akhirnya kita dipisahkan
Munkinkah menguji kesetiaan
Kejujuran dan kemanisan iman
Tuhan berikan daku kekuatan

Mungkinkah kita terlupa
Tuhan ada janjinya
Bertemu berpisah kita
Ada rahmat dan kasihnya
Andai ini ujian
Terangilah kamar kesabaran
Pergilah derita hadirlah cahaya

And then there's another thing that has been bugging me since last night. I shouldn't have thought about this for long, boleh lepas je but biasalah Fifiey being overly dramatic and so on. Campur lagi dengan emosi tak stabil sebab semua orang dah say byebye and farewell ni. Haaaa. Nak aku letak lirik The Script pulak ke kat sini? Huks. Dua hari ni rasanya tak boleh bilang dengan jari dah berapa kali aku pasang lagu tu. Where's the good in goodbye? There's no good in goodbye, so please say farewell. BUT STILL THERE'S NO FAIR IN FAREWELL DID YOU SEE WHAT THE SCRIPT DID THERE


Yesterday lepak chill makan aiskrim sebentar dengan Fareez, Maryam dan Irfan. Beria ajak makan aiskrim, beria sembang ramai nak turun, last sekali empat orang je. Jijul turun jugak tapi naik awal, dahlah Jijul tak nak belanja :'( Tapi takpe, Fareez belanja aiskrim yayyyyyyyyyyyyy and Maryam kongsi air hikhok And then Fareez beli air milo and acah acah buat aku jeles sebab aku cakap air tu sedap (serius weh, dua tiga hari ni sedap pulak air milo orang kafe buat) Dalam sejam jugak lah kiteorang lepak habiskan masa yang memang banyak ni :') Last la kot jumpa diorang (except Maryam) sebab malam tu Fareez gi Banting ke mana entah lulz and Irfan dah balik harini.

LEPAS TU malam tu 10 kerat budak SH3 main Truth or Dare dekat depan opis KUAZ. Buat bulatan and then main........ Serius scary game tersebut......... But lalalala I don't think anyone was being truly honest pun last night. Erm. Or was it just me hahahahahahahahahahahha k. More like "Lie or Dare" and you pick "Lie". #LiesPeopleTell seriously last night was a close call for me (hi there if you're reading this, you probably already know what I'm talking about hiks). Anyway last night was really fun. After almost three hours of Truth or Dare, kiteorang gi ambik gambar and then bermulalah sesi heart-to-heart. Pukul 4 pagi baru tidur dan bangun-bangun mata panda sampai ke petang. K.

Haih mereput lagi. Tadi tengok Night At The Musem: Secret Of the Tomb. NAMPAK TAK PROSES PEREPUTAN SEDANG GIAT DIJALANKAN. Sebelum exam kemain plan nak keluar lepas final. Tetiba lepas final nak bergerak turun katil pun rasa macam seluruh badan ni meraung-raung tak nak bangun. Malas katanya. K.

Last but not least.

I love you




Setiap orang ada limit dia.

Sama ada prinsip hidup dia.

Tahap sabar dia.

Biasa kita dengar tentang limit kesabaran.

Tapi hari ini aku takkan bercakap tentang itu.


Dari pelbagai sudut, orang expect kita macam-macam.

Orang berharap kita mampu buat sesuatu.

Tapi jika hanya mampu yang dipertimbangkan, ke mana hendak dicampak limit yang sudah ditegaskan pada diri?

Biarlah, orang kata aku tak mampu.

Jujur mungkin aku mampu.

Cuma di sebalik kemampuan itu terselit satu prinsip yang sukar untuk dibatasi.



Nafsu. Semua orang ada.

Aku pun ada.

Mungkin logik akal akan kata, "Biarlah, takkan ada apa-apa terjadi."


Berfikir tentang ini buat aku tertanya-tanya, di manakah letaknya malu seorang wanita jika dia sendiri tidak tahu menjaga malu?

Aku hanya insan kerdil yang saban hari perlu meminta dari Tuhan supaya beri aku kekuatan.

Sebab, sungguhlah, Allah tak duga kita melebih-lebih dari apa yang kita mampu hadapi.

Jaga adab, wanita.

Terkadang aku tak jaga, tapi manusia memang buat silap.

Biarlah tak ada orang nak menjaga, aku usahakan untuk terus berjaga-jaga.

Farewell PASUM (Part 1)


A week left before PASUM ends.

Four more papers to go.

And then, Terengganu, I'm coming!

Seriously sungguh pun waktu sekejap je berlalu. Daripada tak berminat nak masuk Universiti Malaya, daripada tak tahu PASUM tu apa, sampai sekarang dah arif dah perihal PASUM dan UM (not really lah, I still don't know how the buses operate, but whatever). Seriously in my 17 years of living, I didn't even know the existence of PASUM. Suddenly I filled in my UPU form, and PASUM was my first choice.

Heck, did I really know PASUM back then?

Well, I did do a little research about PASUM, the Internet helped me, of course. I Googled something like "PASUM blog", "studying in PASUM", "apa itu PASUM" and found some entries that were well written. I also asked one of my seniors in SHAMS that studied in PASUM the session before, and she did warned me about the stress and pressure in becoming a PASUM student. My peers mostly didn't choose PASUM, of course, being the typical sekolah agama students, they'd put UIA or USIM as first choice(s). I, on the other hand, wanted something different. So I chose PASUM. Kekekeke.

What I found on the internet was such lies. HAHAHAHHAHAAH they told us stories about how heavenly staying at KK12 was. We'd get a room for two persons and there'd be enough necessities around. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA little that we knew there was going to be a transformation and taraaaaaaaaa I was placed in KK11...........and I got a double-decker.......and I got the top one. Smooth. Don't ask me to describe my feelings during my first days in KUAZ. Hahahahahhaaha it was horrible until my brother bought me a small fan *laughs awkwardly*

ze gang

The first two weeks were about adapting ourselves to PASUM. I got new friends, Wahidah, Amal, Jessie, Nooreen, Mazuni, Zaza, Sofi, Nana, Dee, Afi, Nadia, Aini, Ainul and Ema (these were the girls around my room and the first three are/were my roommates). And from Nooreen, I knew Ziqa and Suzie.

The five of us (Wahidah, Nooreen, Ziqa and Suzie and I) were inseparable during the free weeks, going to KPS and all. After that, the real 'hell' began when all of us were grouped into tutorial classes, anddddddd was I glad to be classmates with SUZIE YAY! Since then, I became obsessed with Suzie hahahahahhahaha (if Nooreen read this, she'd be "Mehhh" hahahahaha)


I miss them all so muchitos!

They say the S stands for "sembang". I can't say I disagree.....

ada orang sabotaj gambar ni, akmal tak masuk -_-
Okay when I first stepped into the classroom, I was greeted by four boys sitting at the back near the door (since I entered through the back door) with Suzie. OBVIOUSLY I only knew Suzie alone lols and then the first tutorial class started, Puan Azlina had us introduced ourselves. From there on, I got new friends from all over the countryyyy~

We have Suziana from Jempol, Negeri Sembilan. She's sweet, charming, funny and sometimes insecure but she's all there is to describe a good friend. We were almost inseparable throughout semester 1 that everyone got jealous lulzzzz I am very devoted to Suzie because I don't know, her easy-going personality gets through me and I feel okay and comfortable whenever I'm around her. She just has this golden aura that I like and if I could really read auras, hers are going to entangle with mine mwehehehe

Serious nooo Intannnn

Latest picture of us QH3 and RH1 from SH3

me ghosta
And then we also have Najihan and Nana from Perak. Jihan didn't stay long, went for the MARA programme in Kulim but I sempat satu group with her during Biology presentation (with Suzie sekali hehehee).

Nanaaaaaaa on the other hand was the light in the class, her outspoken quality and bising and kepoh is soooooooooo Nana! I miss her so much during semester 2 huhuhu every now and then I'd hear her shiny and happy laughter :)

Then ada Shikin, Ijan and Akmal from Pahangggg! This trio along with Qiela selalu together, I mean they bonded well with each other.

Shikin and Qiela are sort of the twins that repel. HAHAHAHHAHAHA but after some time they go along well.

Whereas Ijan as far as I can remember, he was absent for two weeks due to chicken pox and when he came back Suzie and I became instant friends with him. He was a nice sweet little dude until.........we got to know him better and he sangat annoying suka bash orang -_- but we are friends anyway, I mean, like, we bash him too hahahhaha

with our lecturer/demonstrator Fizik, Pn Norhafiza
ohhh don't forget Akmal, one of PASUM hotstuffs (though he doesn't like to be referred as one), who, of course, like Ijan, seemed like a good boy at first, but then you get to know him well.... hmmpphhh sama je

Arifah and Syera, from Kelantan. I go along instantly with these girls since I'd just speak Kelantanese with them ~_~ Arifah is a sweet innocent-looking girl who has a low voice that I sometimes have a hard time to hear -_____- whereas Syera is a playful-in-a-mature-way girl.

Next? Ada Syida, which is a quiet girl but ------------, she's an intelligent guru! Hehe. Diam-diam ubi berisi budak nih. She doesn't speak much, but whenever we encounter each other she'd say hi and greet me with a smile (of course la I greeted her first since I greet everyone that I know IN AN ECSTATIC MANNER u.u) Syida is from Johor, by the way.

Yanie, Insyi and Sherry. Yanie is the smallest in the class so I sometimes call her kecik lulz Walaupun kecik, tapi boleh tahan annoying jugak lah minah ni, rasa macam nak gomol-gomol macam adik. Almost everyone nicknames her 'adik' and call her 'underage' due to her height hahahahahhahahahah jahat doh semua orang. Yanie was close dengan Insyi, they both sat beside me but Insyi didn't stay long, she went for Sunway scholarship :')

Sherry is known as the lady leopard since she always wears that 'leopard' shawl of hers xD Yanie and Sherry are from KL and Insyi? Perak.

Another two boys from SH3 are Dani and Iqbal. These two were like Suzie and, bromance? Hahahahahahhaha luls. Well, they are the two opposites that attract, I guess. Dani's the one who cracks the jokes, and Iqbal'd be the one laughing. Dani was so bising dalam kelas and Iqbal was the quiet one. Dani sat behind me and kacau semua orang dalam kelas ESPECIALLY Qiela and Nana *sighs* I got the 'fortune' to be in the same group with him every single time because of alphabet order. Iqbal, on the other hand, was my chemistry lab partner sekali dengan Suzie, and liked to mintak kertas kajang and stuff from me -_-

And then.....

The last group, goes to...

The ones that stay with me in QH3 :)

1. Intan Afiqah from Kedah. She's a cool girl and likes to cubit me if she feels like it. Partly because she geram since I'm so comel kannnnnnnnnnnnn -____- Sometimes I open up myself to her, telling her things that I shouldn't err err err, but don't worry everything that I've ever told her is no secret to Suzie because I make sure Suzie knows first ahead of everyone hehehee

Hikhok tetiba Erna masuk hahahhaha
2. Munirah or Moooon from Seremban, Negeri Sembilan. A small girl with a big voice. She can be scary if she wants, too. Ever since we're classmates in QH3, I've been stuck as her group members in everything -..- She's pretty okay. She always confides me in with her crush problems ahahahahahhahahahaha I'm so screwed up I don't even know how to give love advice but hey, I can be a great listener ;)

3. Anis Fitriah from Penang. This girl never leaves her dialek behind. She's stuck with it, I guess. Everyone can tell she's orang Utara. I bonded with her at the end of semester 1, during finals. She's a quiet girl but I should've known better EVERYONE WHO SEEMS TO BE AN INTROVERT IS NOT ONE WHEN YOU GET TO KNOW THEM BETTER -___- mengada-ngada sangat dia nih tumbuk kanggg -..-

Ijan looks so...young in this pic hahahahaha oh that's our lab Bio demo
4. Maryam... from Borneo! Sabahan. Well, no I'm not going bah bah here. Unless I can really speak Sabah, I can do bah bah. Maryam is the one yang aku rapat dekat QH3 since Suzie dah takda en. She's so nice and sweet and always take the blame though she is not to blame *sighs* She can open up easily to me since I'd hear her stories during our walks and duduk together during classes. I also like to tease around. I like being around her. She always has something to talk about.

With these guys la I endured the first semester. During Bio lab usually I was with Syera, Ijan and Ifah. We teamed up. But anyways I selalu jugak tiru-meniru Munirah and Akmal and everyone tiru everyone also ahhahahahaa and then during Chemistry punya lab, I partnered up with Suzie and Iqbal. And for Physics, I was in the same group with Dani, Anis, Maryam and Intan. Satu lagi group pun ngan Dani, Maryam and Intan - group kelas IT. Then group Algebra dengan Suzie, Ifah, Dani and Iqbal -_-"

All of us were good, until things got somewhat distant in the end, and I have no idea why. Huhuhu but we made up la eventually. Then we dapat tahu that we had to separate during semester 2, and that news broke me apart T.T (but hey QH3 was awesome!) Masa semester 2 we still had dinner together when we had the time and our WhatsApp group is still active. We love to tease each other and get emotional all the time and then everyone got so emo and in the end I know that we miss each other and we express our feelings by being emo wahahaha

Okay so, done for part 1. Let's wait for part 2, 3 and 4! (or maybe more...)